Starting with a blank slate in 2018!

You have to let go to move forward….

Every year brings its own challenges, joys, changes and insights. Somehow, I thought that things would get easier as I got older.

That somehow all the blessings and knowledge acquired over the years would evolve me into this amazing adult woman who felt confident, knew what to say, when to say it and that I would be full of wisdom to offer others.

I thought that my family relationships would get better. That my business would continue to grow gradually without having to work so hard, that my health would improve as I took care of my body and soul.

I thought that I would live happily ever after with my beloved. That we would walk together hand in hand into the mystery and marvel of life, that life would embrace me as her own, that I would worry less and feel more fulfilled overall.

In truth, many of these things are true and have happened in 2017. And many others have not.

Life sometimes feels like dancing on a fluid terrain: every time that you think that you’ve nailed it, that you’ve gotten ahead, that you’ve acquired some applicable knowledge that render measurable results, there’s another adjustment to be made.

The incredible irony of it all is that all of my research and work is literally the study of the living matrix.

Everyday, I assist a variety of people in aligning their bodies, their beliefs and their spirits. It’s actually my tagline: “Mind-body Alignment & Beyond!”

So, I have researched and sought for answers in 2017 as to why life doesn’t necessarily get easier over time. Why can’t life just keep getting better without having a right and left hook coming at us when we least expect it?!

Here are just a few points of what I’ve discovered:

  1. We, humans, are creatures of habit. We have hundreds of habits that we repeat day in and day out. Some are awesome. More still are detrimental (ex: addictions vs. discipline)
  2. We create stories in our heads of what we think we want only to find out that it’s just that: a story.
  3. Life is sometimes hard. For everyone. But it’s just hard. What’s really difficult is the amount of attention we invest in this belief. (Please refer to point #1.)

If you’ve ever done anything taxing in your life like run a marathon, attend a triathlon, or a tough mudder competition you know that you have to train seriously for it. You will have to change your habits, get up earlier, go out for a run or to the gym every day, hire a trainer, adjust your diet, do your homework, invest in appropriate training clothing, psych yourself up by listening to motivational podcasts, and repeat this every day.

And if you continue to do this every day until competition day, you might have a fair chance at getting to the end of your competition. Notice, I am not speaking of winning any medals here. This is just to get you into the race and actually finishing it.

If you want a medal, well then, you have to invest in a totally different mindset and reeeaally do the work. Up until now, you’ve successfully adapted to a new possibility for yourself but in no way are we discussing a gold medal win.

And therein lies the devastating problem.

This scenario can feel like no matter how much we try, how much energy we put into our training, that it will just never be enough.

We are addicted to “not being enough”.

On the other hand, I have also learned that we humans are beyond resilient.

I have used myself, this year, as my own guinea pig to measure my own “not enough” story (“Not enough” = #’s 1, 2 and 3 listed above).

Here are my results:

First and foremost, I learned that in order to fully move ahead, I had to release what I believed were failures. If I didn’t let go of my own story of how it should have been or how it could have been better or how I could have done better, been more present, if only I had been a better person, practitioner, wife, sister, friend!!

To ask myself these questions, I discovered, was not only pointless but injurious.

What was helpful however was to apply myself in learning how to ask better questions.

For example: What am I grateful for today? What would make today great? What amazing things happened to me today/yesterday? What have I learned today? What am I proud of today? How has today added to the quality of my life? How can I use today as an investment in my future? Who do I love? (and very importantly…..) Who loves me?

This line of questioning keeps you focused on what is working instead of what is not working in your life. Can you see how important asking the “right” questions becomes on the path to a fulfilling life?

Conversely, what I have found to be the most detrimental is cynicism.

Cynicism is the cancer of the soul.

Here are a few synonyms for cynicism: Skepticism, doubt, distrust, mistrust, suspicion, disbelief.

If you recognize your own thinking patterns resembling cynicism, find help now. Your mind is playing a dirty game on you and if you keep hanging out there, your entire life will have been a hellish experience.

What I’m saying is that your habits, stories and beliefs are your responsibility. You have the power, control and resiliency to change them. It is within you to do so. Do not allow for anyone to tell you otherwise.

Participate and Contribute

In order to release of your old stories and beliefs around failure or “not-enoughness”, you must train yourself to participate in the game of life.

This can be done in several ways and in ways that best suit your personality, interests and curiosities.

For me, my indispensable cure-alls are my Mindfulness Meditation practice and my fitness training. Nothing takes precedence over these two activities. As a creature of habit, I choose to practice habits that empower my mind, body and soul.

And last but certainly not least, you have to contribute to your environment and community in order to feel whole and complete.

It’s just the way we humans are wired. We have an internal need to contribute and share of our goodness with one another.

It is the most basic of human traits. We have a need to support, share love and be loved.

My commitment to contribution in 2017 was to create a larger footprint for goodness.

What that means is that I’ve decided to get serious about how I can support others. I have done this by creating live classes, more online coaching calls, more free sessions (check your mail or inbox), sharing of my message of love and connection and to launch a new Mindful Communication online class in 2018.

Instead of focusing on some of the challenges that 2017 brought me, I decided to tap into my resilience and become even bolder in putting myself out there in the hopes of spreading the message that:

YOU ARE ENOUGH!!

And more than that, you are loved, you are important, you matter and you belong.

If any of what I have shared in this newsletter resonate with you, take action and join the Art of Alignment tribe!

It’s very easy to do. All that is required is to show up and share of yourself in a positive way. That means verbally, interactively but most importantly energetically.

Choose to begin this year with a pep in your step, no matter the obstacles or fears.

You deserve to be happy and live a fulfilled life.

Our upcoming coaching call is this Thursday, December 21st, from 12 – 1:30pm EST.

I will share tools to release any perceived failures, fears or disappointments from 2017 and begin 2018 from a brand new blank slate where you get to begin again.

We all deserve a new start. It’s just a matter of letting go of old patterns and beliefs.

The fastest way to let go of the past is to join a group of like-minded individuals who are also on the path to a healthier, happier and more fulfilling life.

That’s us 😉 Sign up here.

Happy Holidays to All!

Love,

AMD

Anne-Marie Duchêne